Monday, May 9, 2011

"Do You Hear Him Calling?"

I don't know about you, but "The Call" makes me want to learn how to play the cello!
"Lift Up Your Face" is my favorite song right now.
~~~
Listen to "Lift up Your Face" and read the written words. Also, some point in the song, it says, "Do you hear Him calling?" Do you?

Today, I am talking about callings.

In order to be called into something, we must first be listening. We must first have our eyes wide open. The way we are called is also about how we must respond to the call.

Do you hear Him calling?

I have been very interested in joining the Youth worship team lately. Since I discovered that I can sing in very late 2009, I have been doing solos and I did two ensembles,  one which I greatly dreaded. But Mariah B., if you're reading this, I'm not talking about the ensemble with you! I enjoyed that one!
I've been singing a lot lately, since our Christian Band is going to Phoenix for the 2011 Compelled By Love National Fine Arts Festival and I practiced a solo for the district festival.

I have always had dreams of being a singer or guitar player (or both!) in a band. But I never imagined how... Until randomly, I've felt that I really want to join the Youth band. Even if I have to force myself to join, I will do everything I can.

I want to say I'm called into music ministry, but then again, I just don't know.

I'm kinda excited about [most likely] joining the worship team, and I'm kinda nervous/scared. Why? I don't know... I've got no stage presence, I've got a very narrow vocal range, and my range I'm most comfortable in (medium to low) makes me sound like a little kid, and if I sing low enough I sound like a six-year-old boy... maybe because I've been practicing my man voice quite frequently lately.  I've promised myself I'll work on it over the summer, after all, I sorta have no choice because Nationals is in August and I'm a backup singer... Even though I'm not singing the verses, (only choruses) I've got to have presence. So guaranteed, I will work on my presence. I'm obligated to work on it.

I'm not just worried about that, but what if I forget the lyrics...

WAIT, wait. Forgetting lyrics? Is that seriously all I have to lose?

It's just like the angel-on-shoulder/devil-on-shoulder thing: One part of me is saying I could die up there and another part of me is saying go for it.

It's really not that hard a decision, but for me, decisions take forever, especially this one. Once, it took me a week to decide on which to attend: my last soccer game (hated soccer) or a so-called friend's birthday party. I must have really been annoyed by that person, because in the end, I chose soccer instead! But now I regret not going because it could've made her feel bad and that was the last party she invited me to and the last time I saw her was in 2007. (I think.) And that was at a mutual friend's party, in which I kept my distance from her, not to be mean. But I feel bad because after all, she was sorta nice and she taught me how to do a one-arm cartwheel and taught me a little bit about piano. So yeah. I felt guilty for awhile because I'm obviously a people-pleaser... always feel obligated by everyone to do everything I can't do, else I usually go into this huge scenario that will never happen, which usually ends in some sort of consequence and/or failure that will also never happen.

I know why I want to join. That band is small, they need more people. Just like I write for the love of God and to reach out, why can't I do the same with my voice?

I'm worried about singing in front of these people by a lot, but what should I be nervous about? It's an audience of one: Jesus. It's by Him that I am compelled to do this, so no matter what, by the end of summer, if it's God's Will for me, I will be on that worship team. Even if that means forcing myself to do it.

"Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements?" I'll take choice 2, please.

CONCLUSION
No matter what your insecurities are, (is it evident that I have quite a few?) God can use you. But first, you must be listening. How do you know if it's a calling? Ha, that's what I'm asking you! (Commenting welcome to everyone.) Whether you know what it is or not, be open to listen. Who cares if you make mistakes? "la la la, whatever. la la la, it doesn't matter. la la la, oh well..." (from 'Tonight, Tonight'. That's my song!) It doesn't matter, no one's perfect. Whether you're performing a drama solo or simply telling someone about Jesus, it's for an audience of one: Jesus. Even though the message is going to PEOPLE, just remember, He will be with you ALWAYS.

"Lift up your face, salvation is calling, salvation is calling your name..."
-Third Day

No comments:

Post a Comment

All comments appreciated, keep them appropriate, however. Remember, this blog's audience is ages 12+, so be aware of who might be reading.